Change is the essence of life — but it’s not always easy

“Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become.” ~ Author Unknown

Change. It’s a fact of life, something that we must accept in order to grow. But if you’re a parent of a child with special needs, you know how hard it is for your child to accept change. It can be the simplest alteration in routine — a quick stop at the grocery store after school — that spins your child out of control.

This week, I found out that there is a big change coming in Ruby’s life. Our PCA of over two and a half years has found a new job working with autistic children. While I am so happy for her and her exciting change, I know this change is going to be anything but exciting for Ruby.

Fortunately, I had the foresight this winter to start planning for Ruby to go to a daycare in first grade next year, as I knew it would be impossible or unlikely that a PCA would be able to work just a couple of hours before and after school each day. I found the perfect setting for her, but I didn’t feel she’d be ready to start until this summer. However, this week’s news means that I don’t really have a choice anymore — she has to start in two weeks. Thankfully, after a frantic call to daycare, she has a spot available for Ruby to start immediately.

I’m so grateful that I don’t have to fret over finding a daycare in two weeks; however, I know that the hardest part of this change has yet to come. This is going to cause a major disruption in Ruby’s life and with it may come some behavioral issues we haven’t dealt with in quite some time. I’ve set up some visits to daycare this week and next and I’ve already spoken at length with her about the new daycare to hopefully ease the transition, but I’m still worried that it’s going to be really hard on her.

I feel so helpless right now. Helpless because Ruby won’t understand why this change is occurring. Helpless because I wish I could quit working full-time to stay home with her and helpless because I don’t have more time to transition her into her new daycare.

But, despite all of the helplessness I’m feeling right now, I know that this change was brought into our lives for a reason: to help us grow. And without growth, Ruby wouldn’t be where she is today.


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